Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
