Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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