goodnight i made you a song goodbye
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
