god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Small penises have feelings too.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
