i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
