I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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