im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Mom said you looked used
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
