Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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