she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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