I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
