just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize