This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
