Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
