I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
