I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
