k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Blood and glitter go together right?
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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