I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
