I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
