It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
