Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
