Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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