Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
