i permit you to call me
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I skipped work to stalk him.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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