is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
She bit a glass in half.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize
