Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
