Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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