We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I CAN MOONWALK!
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
