my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
