just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
