return my video game
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
