do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize