thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
