Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
