so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
