It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
