Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
