I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
