Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
