Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
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