What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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