Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
