I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize