Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
