and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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