i just wanna soil my oats bro
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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