So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
