Jerry, you need to find god
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
