I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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