Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
