I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
