Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Your tits are I can't wait for
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
